Stuff to Do

After receiving several responses, here's what my take on 'loving myself' is:   Replacing "I hate myself" with "God loves me" Replacing "I'm so ugly" with "God made me beautiful" Replacing "I'm worthless" with "God thinks I'm priceless" Replacing "I'm a terrible mother" with "I was born to do this" Replacing "I can't" with "We can"   Loving myself comes from loving others - my children, my husband, my family, my friends. So I'm going to play with my kids, cook lovely dinners, keep my home tidy (as much as you can with a toddler and an almost crawler), keep myself tidy, do the laundry, and make our home a haven. In serving my family, I serve God, and therein lies my reward. Now off to get Pippa up - she's a sleepyhead today! XOXO, Sarah

What does it mean to love yourself unconditionally?The whole concept is confusing to me. I know how to love my family, but loving myself? I don't get it. Is it something simple or is it something complex. Anyway, that's what I'm meant to be working on for the next couple of weeks. Loving myself unconditionally, and without judgement.   Something else I've discovered is that in wanting to be passionate about what I do -  I am passionate about what I do - it's just a quiet passion. It's not public, it's private. What drove my passion for other jobs was the recognition I got from other people. Well I might not receive recognition and awards like I did at my other jobs, but there are rewards. They are in the small things, like when I'm watching my girls play together. When Charlie eats all the dinner I've prepared for her. When Pippa smiles at me, content and happy and secure. When Lachlan says "Great pizza, Sar". When the girls ...

Seriously. I do. I had this idea, to make personalised Christmas ornaments for everyone out of playdough. Ambitious, but something I could sort of do with Charlie Brown. Here are the first 4, and they turned out awesome! Just in case you can't tell from the photo, clockwise from top left they are: a handbag with a flower on it, a coffee mug, a flamingo, and flower. How cool are they?!? I can't wait to get the supplies to make the rest of them! Otherwise, we're doing okay. Not fantastic, but not terrible. Just okay. Taking one day at a time, one hour at a time. Trying not to sweat the small stuff. (And it's all small stuff). Now off to cook dinner - Pizza for grownups and lentils and barley for Charlie. XOXO, Sarah

Charlie is so overtired today - she may actually get in 3 naps. She's got some broken skin between her toes, and goes berserk when I even look at it, let alone try to put medicine on it. Lachlan will have to help me by holding her down so I can get at it to clean it.   Philippa is a bit sick, with some congestion. So the immunisations are postponed again. At this rate, she'll be due for the 6-month ones before we ever get to her 4 month ones. I put it off, because her 4 month lot fell during school holidays, and no way was I going to go during school holidays. Plus, I'd done the same with her 2 month ones, and I didn't want them to be too close together.   Sometimes I find my 'job' enjoyable, and sometimes I get so bored with the mundane-ness of it all. My biggest challenges are getting red crayon off the wall (turned out to be easy-peasy shampoo- squeezy with the help of this product ), and not eating the entire bucket of sugar cookies I ju...

I am not you. I love you and I respect you, but I am not you. So I'm going to stop trying to be you. Because it's not working for me. There are many people in my life, people whom I respect and admire. I see their life from my view, and it looks pretty awesome. I think "I want some of that!", but here's the rub: I am not them. So what works for them, may or may not work for me. I've got to be a wife to my husband, and a mother to my children, and I've got to do what works for us, instead of forcing us into a mold that isn't made for us. I've got to do the best I can, making each day better than the one before it. It doesn't mean that I love anyone less, or disagree with their parenting style, or anything like that - it's just that I'm striving to find what is right for our family. So I'm forging a new path with my husband and kids - one that's made for us, and no one else. I may or may not take it, but advice is...

My children and I love a good routine. It's just how we are. There's nothing wrong with that, and I won't apologise to anyone for it. The only time we (and by we I mean me) have a problem is when I mess with the schedule. Like forcing Charlie to stay awake so we can go to playgroup or Bible study. Then she's overtired, sleeps too early, and gets crazy in the evening, which stresses me out beyond belief. Or when I'm out and Pippa doesn't sleep - which makes her overtired, and cranky, and she doesn't want to feed properly, so then she's hungry, and you get the picture. So here's the thing: I'm not messing with naps any more. Yes, it's a pain in the rump to schedule our outings around sleep times, but the insanity that ensues from disrupted sleep is so much worse. This is only for a short time, and someday the girls will be big and I'll be able to look back and remember how much better it was because we weren't cranky and t...

Pippa's made it past 5 kgs, and doubled her birthweight! It felt at times like we'd never get here, but here we are. I'm so happy, and relieved. I'd been considering supplementing with formula, and I really didn't want to. I don't have anything against it, it's just that I was afraid it would be the beginning of the end of breastfeeding for us. But now I feel so encouraged, and so good about myself for hanging on. And I feel so much more confident that we can make this work. Thanks to all for your help and encouragement! XOXO, Sarah

How cute are they?!? On a somewhat unrelated note, I have a 'reality check' tip that I'd like to share with you all. Don't bother cleaning fingerprints off of anything until your kids have gone to bed. For the night. Because that's the ONLY time they will stay gone. Yes, you'll be asleep so does it matter really, which it does to me because I'm a bit of a neat freak these days, but it will be clean. At least until the morning. But that's the beauty of a new day - we get to start all over again. Yesterday's fingerprints make no difference to today. XOXO, Sarah

Just look at this: I don't think it's necessary to say anything more than: I rock da kitchen! XOXO, Sarah

But it sure shocked me. My psychologist says that in her opinion, the expectations I have for myself as a person and as a mother are unrealistically high. In my desire to not repeat my own mother's (biological) mistakes, I have set standards for myself that are unreachable by even the best of mothers. So I feel like a failure, because I'm not reaching the mark. Which is what we'll be working on in our sessions. Setting more realistic expectations for myself. Because the truth is, I wouldn't expect half as much from anyone I know. I would never hold anyone to the standard that I have set for me. Not that I think I'm better than anyone else or anything, it's just how I think. Anyway, just thought I'd share. XOXO, Sarah

To Do: Pick up photos Make immunisation appointment for Pippa Mop kitchen floor hang out washing Buy salad ingredients Take Pippa to Chemist to be weighed Doctor's appointment Bible study   Dinner tonight: Mountain-class pizza (pizza with heaps of toppings) Tossed Salad Garlic Bread   So hopefully, my toddler will wake up her normal self, which will make doing all this stuff that much easier. She vomited again last night (on Lachlan), after the teeth brushing. She was off her food all day, so she might be coming down with something. I fell over the stupid gate at the bottom of the stairs last night . I ended up taking the whole fall on my knees, as I was holding Pippa at the time and my arms were busy hanging on to her. I also shoved Charlie out of the way so I didn't fall on her. Scared the living daylights out of her. But we're all okay, apart from my carpet-burned and very sore knees. At any rate, I've got to go shower and dress whil...

I couldn't think of a title for today. So there. We're back in our little home, and I think the time away did us all a world of good. I talked to a friend of mine from playgroup today, and she said I sounded so refreshed. I do feel that way, I suppose. We've implemented a new schedule that despite my initial protestations and crankiness, has made things run a lot more smoothly. I try not to get too bent out of shape when things don't go according to schedule, but old habits die hard. Like this morning, I set the alarm on my phone for 6AM, because that's the time I've chosen to start my day, but because I never changed the actual time on the phone to allow for daylight savings, I didn't get up until 6:30. (mine still said 5:30). But we shifted, and it's all good. Also, Philippa doesn't always feed at the time that I want, so I allow for that too. But it's helpful, to have the day broken up into chunks that way. It makes the day, and...

Or maybe it's a sort of working holiday, I suppose. The girls and I have come to visit Lachlan's parents for a week, as well as to catch up with some girlfriends. The first night started out okay, but when it was time to sleep - wow, did I cop an earful from my youngest. She screamed on and off for 3 hours. That might not seem like a long time, but when you're in the thick of it, especially when you are at someone else's house, it's an eternity. I kept trying to feed her, but she didn't want it. Teething? Pain in the belly? She's not done a poo since Saturday, so maybe that's it. Anyway, with a bit of bed hopping, we settled down. Started with Charlie in the portacot, Pippa was going to sleep with me in the bed, and it ended up with Pippa in the portacot and Charlie in the bed with me. I'd be falling asleep, then be awakened by a small finger up my nose. (Not my finger, folks!) The next night was awesome, with both girls going to sleep with no proble...