I Don't Have It Figured Out Yet. Or Maybe I Do?
As my 45th birthday approached, I wasn't feeling very good about it. I'm overweight, not in the most fantastic health, I've only just worked out what I want to be when I grow up, I feel like a mediocre domestic, and I'm happy, most of the time. I love Jesus, I love my family. I try to love the people around me. The thing that was kind of freaking me out was that 45 is kind of close to *looks around furtively* 50. It's just a number, I know. It's also a whopping five years away. Jesus could come back before then. The thing about that particular number though, is that when I was 25, (and I don't really remember because hello, 25 years, plus four children equals poor memory), I thought I'd be settled, or have stuff figured out. I thought I'd be - I don't know, mature? Self-confident? Sigh. I'm only just starting on the road to confident, and I'm definitely NOT mature. I have a few things figured out, but many more that