This Ends Today.

This arrogance of mine, which says "I can be all things to all people all the time and do it all perfectly". 

I'm calling myself out, starting today.


Dear Sarah, 

You are so lovely. You have a huge heart, and many good intentions. You can't possibly be all the things to all the people all the time and do it perfectly. And before you say "But..." let's take a second and be honest. Because if you can't be honest in a conversation with yourself, then when can you be? 

You want to support your husband as he pursues his degree. Very noble of you, indeed. But how can you do that if you fall ill because you don't take care of yourself? 

Your children? What would they do if you were suddenly very ill? 

Yes, your family would cope. Eventually. A new normal would arise, and life would go on. 

But wouldn't it be far better to avoid that whole scenario? Of course it would!

So. Where does that leave you? Here is what I'm telling you to do. 
1. Shower. Yes, every single day. 
2. Eat food. Regularly. And no, Peanut Butter and Jelly is really not enough to be considered dinner, no matter how much peanut butter you use. 
3. Exercise. Just do it already. You know you need to do it, you know it will do wonders for your mental health, and your family need you to not be a stark raving mad cow. 
4. For crying out loud, let people help you already! Your children are not helpless, and neither is your husband. Stop trying to control the universe and Ask. For. Help. 
5. Get out of the house at least once every day. Even to the clothesline. If the walls are closing in, and you start to feel a bit Jack Nicholson-esque, get out. Breathe fresh air, soak up some vitamin D. It will help, I promise. 

I love you, I really do. And you know something? You are right that your family need you. But they need you for a long time, and this thing that you do, this self-loathing instead of self-care - it isn't going to help you achieve longevity. It holds you back from enjoying your family. I want better for you, and I hope you do too. 

Much love,
You


Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

What a relief!

I have a hard time keeping secrets. Not other people's secrets, but my own. So when I have a secret, I really want to broadcast it to the world. The last 5 days have been incredibly difficult for me, but finally I can tell everyone.   I am indeed, as my sister eloquently put it, with child. Well, given the title of my blog I'm usually with child, but specifically, my uterus is with child again.   It's truly amazing how even just the knowledge that you are pregnant can change your perceptions. Monday, I didn't know. It didn't even cross my mind. Tuesday morning, I didn't know. Tuesday afternoon, I know. And all of a sudden, I'm exhausted and nauseated. Physically, I am no different, really from Monday to today. But mentally, emotionally? My world has been officially rocked!   XOXO, Sarah
Keep reading

Where Do We Go Next?

The truth is, nobody really knows what happens next.  At the stroke of midnight,  people will celebrate the close of a year that has felt absolutely interminable. We all hope things get better, we talk about how we are hopeful - but what are we going to DO to make it better? I'm a storyteller. In the words that I write, in the food I prepare, in singing, in decorating my home, in my garden. Until now, much of my storytelling has been reflective, introspective. In this new year, I want to tell stories that bring us together. I'm stepping out of my own head, and writing words that tell the story of courageously walking towards that big fat question mark.  What happens next? Don't know, and it doesn't matter. I'm stepping out to meet it no matter what it is. I'm not hiding behind pretty words for another day of my life.  What would my life be like if I finished my certificate and got a job at a school? I don't know, but I'm doing it anyway. What would it fe
Keep reading

Please understand

I know I haven't been very communicative lately, and trust me - there's a really REALLY good reason. I'll be able to spill the beans in a few days' time, but until then, it's really hard for me to write anything without giving anything away. So, as soon as possible, I'll be back to normal blogging practices, boring the daylights out of you all with my inane stories of poop, pee, and other hilarious bodily functions. :-)   XOXO, Sarah
Keep reading