Mother's Day
I have two mothers. First, there's the woman who gave birth to me, and for the first 19 years of my life, was the only mother I knew. Her part in my story isn't finished, though she might pretend otherwise. I hope and pray for reconciliation between us, but that is entirely up to her.
Then there's the woman who became my mom when I was 20. The woman who had many 'bathroom chats' with me, about life-altering decisions. Don't ask me why they always occur in the bathroom, they just do. She taught me to drive. She's the mom who walked down the aisle with me when I got married the first time, the one who was there for me when it all fell apart. The one who traveled to Texas to help me start rebuilding my life. The one who was generous enough to open her home (and heart) to my new boyfriend (and now husband!), and was there to celebrate my marriage to him. She was there to celebrate with us when we fell pregnant the first time, and a short time later, she dried my (many) tears when I lost the babies. She was there to dry my hair when I was baptised. She was there when we moved to Texas, and again when we moved back. She was there when we fell pregnant again, and again when we were told we'd had a second miscarriage. She was there for us when we moved overseas. She was there when we called to tell her that I hadn't miscarried after all, and was in fact still pregnant. She was there in spirit when I delivered my firstborn. And again when I fell pregnant, and again when I delivered the second. And when my father died, she was there for me even in the midst of her own grief. Because of her love, I no longer feel like an orphan in this world. She may not have given birth to me, but she has been a mother to me in all the ways that matter. She was there for me again when I called to announce yet another pregnancy, and another birth. She was there for me when I called to tell her of yet another pregnancy, and she totally understood my fears and misgivings, and at the same time encouraged me greatly. We may be separated by half the globe, and we don't talk nearly as much as I'd like to, but it doesn't diminish my feelings for her. She is my mother, my friend, my confidant. She 'gets' me. She is amazing, and I love her enormously. My favourite Mother's Day with her was one where we spent the entire day together, shopping, talking, eating, laughing, and polished it off with a movie.
I love both of my mothers, though one has chosen to reject my love. And I won't lie, that hurts. But it doesn't wreck the joy I feel at having such a terrific 'other mother'.
Happy Mother's Day, Mom!
Then there's the woman who became my mom when I was 20. The woman who had many 'bathroom chats' with me, about life-altering decisions. Don't ask me why they always occur in the bathroom, they just do. She taught me to drive. She's the mom who walked down the aisle with me when I got married the first time, the one who was there for me when it all fell apart. The one who traveled to Texas to help me start rebuilding my life. The one who was generous enough to open her home (and heart) to my new boyfriend (and now husband!), and was there to celebrate my marriage to him. She was there to celebrate with us when we fell pregnant the first time, and a short time later, she dried my (many) tears when I lost the babies. She was there to dry my hair when I was baptised. She was there when we moved to Texas, and again when we moved back. She was there when we fell pregnant again, and again when we were told we'd had a second miscarriage. She was there for us when we moved overseas. She was there when we called to tell her that I hadn't miscarried after all, and was in fact still pregnant. She was there in spirit when I delivered my firstborn. And again when I fell pregnant, and again when I delivered the second. And when my father died, she was there for me even in the midst of her own grief. Because of her love, I no longer feel like an orphan in this world. She may not have given birth to me, but she has been a mother to me in all the ways that matter. She was there for me again when I called to announce yet another pregnancy, and another birth. She was there for me when I called to tell her of yet another pregnancy, and she totally understood my fears and misgivings, and at the same time encouraged me greatly. We may be separated by half the globe, and we don't talk nearly as much as I'd like to, but it doesn't diminish my feelings for her. She is my mother, my friend, my confidant. She 'gets' me. She is amazing, and I love her enormously. My favourite Mother's Day with her was one where we spent the entire day together, shopping, talking, eating, laughing, and polished it off with a movie.
I love both of my mothers, though one has chosen to reject my love. And I won't lie, that hurts. But it doesn't wreck the joy I feel at having such a terrific 'other mother'.
Happy Mother's Day, Mom!
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